I love black thongs
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
