i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
