I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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