Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
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