i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
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