My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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