Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
