I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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