it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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