Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
farters have to be the big spoon...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
