farters have to be the big spoon...
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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