Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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