I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
