Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy

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  (586): Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy http://tfl.nu/kc5d
  Replies (3) Good night (811) Bad night (352) Order T-Shirt
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?

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  (574): I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight? http://tfl.nu/h1kj
  Replies (10) Good night (1686) Bad night (385) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.

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  (512): Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits. http://tfl.nu/amvg
  Replies (42) Good night (4975) Bad night (541)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.

  (906): View more from Michigan

  so you're not coming in to work today?

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  (231): I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops. (906): so you're not coming in to work today? http://tfl.nu/mm6u
  Replies (13) Good night (1248) Bad night (3917)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...

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  (937): I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub... http://tfl.nu/665a
  Replies (9) Good night (6029) Bad night (548) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.

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  (620): We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example. http://tfl.nu/aei8
  Replies (23) Good night (5771) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.

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  (214): i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends. http://tfl.nu/1l9v
  Replies (4) Good night (508) Bad night (3984) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through

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  (512): and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through http://tfl.nu/6tx9
  Replies (14) Good night (5233) Bad night (771) Order T-Shirt
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...

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  (763): Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg... http://tfl.nu/nasy
  Replies (44) Good night (2439) Bad night (6323) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You know, be my cock's hype man.

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  (732): You know, be my cock's hype man. http://tfl.nu/5yns
  Replies (3) Good night (2484) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.

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  (519): ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry. http://tfl.nu/wsym
  Replies (11) Good night (6618) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.

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  (775): You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes. http://tfl.nu/wxud
  Replies (22) Good night (1099) Bad night (4870) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?

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  (516): So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway? http://tfl.nu/m1uu
  Replies (11) Good night (2750) Bad night (1041) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...

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  (775): Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right... http://tfl.nu/dr5k
  Replies (5) Good night (446) Bad night (1130) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...

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  (678): Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters... http://tfl.nu/fqki
  Replies (3) Good night (764) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt

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