just come out here and I will go home with you...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
