we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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