I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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