This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
