No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
