Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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