I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
