Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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