I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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