U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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