Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
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I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
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He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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