You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize