that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
