On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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