Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
