dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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