Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
He? As in you personified your dick?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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