You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
