i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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