All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
third nipple confirmed
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
