I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize