The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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