Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i already hear my dad disowning me
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
they call him Oral-B. enough said
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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