so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
the liver wants what the liver wants
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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