I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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