How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
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