how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
