I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
