awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
