cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize