The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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