If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
