Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
pray to the hookup gods
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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