I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Randomize
