You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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