shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
