Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Buhtt sex?
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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